Wednesday, August 2, 2017

The Day my Life Changed Forever

I grew up in an active family. I loved playing sports and eating healthy. Those of you who have followed my journey know I love working out as much as I can. My whole family is healthy and we encourage each other to be as healthy as we possibly can. My mother and sister are marathon runners and my brother is a personal trainer. Health and wellness are important in our family. All of this being said, it still wasn’t enough for me when I was 11 years old. I remember the day I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, it was a day that changed my life forever. I remember not feeling good that whole day. I asked my teacher several times if I could go to the bathroom. My teacher kept telling me no so many times that I ended up getting in school suspension because they thought I was acting up. When I was in ISS, a nurse and my family came to read my blood sugar and it was so high that the monitor literally just read “high”. No numbers, it just said “high” (which means it was so high that the monitor couldn’t even detect it). All I said after that was “I know it, I’m going to be a diabetic”. My family tried to calm me down and tell me it was going to be okay. I already knew in the back of my mind that I was going to have this disease forever.

After I was diagnosed, I remember crying often and asking “why me” and “I am so healthy, why did this happen to me”.  It took me a while, but after I got over the sadness, frustration, and anger, I realized that God gave me this disease for a reason. I realized that I needed to learn to cope with this disease and move forward. I didn’t see God’s purpose for me having the disease at the time, but I knew that I would learn it in the years to come.

I didn’t tell many people about my disease for a long time. I would not tell my friends and Josh didn’t even know for the first few months that we were together. I finally started coming clean about my disease after years of having it and suddenly I was able to connect with people on a more personal level. For those of you who follow me on Snapchat, you see how my life is affected every day by this disease. I am constantly checking my blood sugar and constantly trying to make sure that my body is reacting well to the food that I eat. The hard part of living with this disease is being sick and still trying to live a healthy life. Anytime my body goes through a change my body goes into a sick mode. My body is very different from the average 22-year-old female, but I strive to work out, eat healthy and maintain a very strict diet. I keep telling myself, I may have Type 1 Diabetes, but Type 1 Diabetes does NOT have me. 

My Type 1 Diabetes was so frustrating at one time that when I was pregnant with my first son, our doctors told me that I would either lose my baby or lose my own life if I continued the pregnancy. They actually recommended that I get an abortion because they thought that it would be that high of a chance for him to not survive. I am so glad that I listened to my heart and decided not to go through with it because Gannon is now 5 years old and healthy as can be.

I had to learn to take care of myself and I knew I wanted to make an impact on this world. I strive every day to motivate others. I am living a sick life and I get messages daily about how I am impacting other’s lives. It’s a high for me for me to know that someone has lost a pound on my program, Body by Mac. It makes me happy when I get a message from another Type 1 Diabetic who is struggling with the same issues that I am. I want to make everyone realize how important their health is. That all started for me when I realized that I had diabetes. If that was God’s will for me to have diabetes, then I am thankful for it. I didn’t realize at 11 years old why God wanted me to have this disease, but now I do. I am able to share my life and my health with everyone so they can see how hard it truly is for me to live life as a Type 1 Diabetic.